i dont want to live too long,
i mean, i dont wish for ripe old age.

im happy enough to live till my 50s and leave dis world.
the thought of myself being a ugly senile old man sends a chill down my spines.
plus, there is nothing to hold back at such old age, why not leave earlier before life turns sour.


life is beautiful,
when u were still young,
dats what i think...

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im so jaded, of everything.
everything.

i cant find the motivation to spur myself on.
im just doing things, which im supposed to, not because i want to.

it makes me all the more appear to be pathetic.

life is technically fair, absolutely discriminating.
i hate it, i hate it.
i once had everything, supposedly.
but before im matured enough to cherish and enjoy it,
its gone before my eye.
and i, in my early childhood, was supposed to face it all by myself,
yes, all by myself, no one was alongside me, to give me support when i needed it the most.
now im grown up, i dont need it anymore.
compare to other more fortunate peers, my future is at large, while they have theirs laid before them to choose.
i need to work hard for my own future. i have to, from scratch.